Gay Couple considering Bs As

[gaycoupleconsideringBsAs]

Hello folks, I have been lurking here off and on over the years, after I spent a month in Bs As back in 2002. I stayed in a little hostel on Viamonte operated by a few Argentinian kids and spent my time trying to learn a little castellano, and living on very little, due to having very little money.

I loved the city and have often thought about going back. Fastforward to today and I have been in a relationship with an American guy (I'm Irish) for about three years, because of the Defence of Marriage Act, I am not able to move to the US and whilst he could move to London, where I live, he is not that fussed on the city, hence we are both considering the idea of a third country and BsAs is an option we are considering.

I suppose the questions I have would be as follows;

How easy is it to be a gay couple in BsAs, I know there is legal protection available and that there is a legal committment to equality but at the same time, that doesn't necessarily guarantee a peaceful existence, are Portenos cosmopolitan enough not to be fazed by a couple of homos living rather pedestrian lives in their midst?

I don't like the idea of the "gay ghetto", but at the same time, the existence of one in someways guarantee a safe space or a sense of having a territory to call your own...whilst I might not use it alot, it would be nice to know it is there....is there such a place in BsAs?

Finally, I hear that starting businesses in BsAs would be a nightmare, if you were interested in opening up a little cafe/bar and could afford to buy the premises and reform it, would that cut out a significant part of the headache that would attend such a venture or would there be plenty of others that would tax you too much to want to do it?

Thanks very much for the time you guys spend reading this. Any insights or responses would be gratefully received.

regards,

Dermot.

 

[sesamosinsal]

I'm gay and from the U.S. I'm married to an Argentine.

I will quickly respond to your questions:

1. I've been called a "puto" maybe once, and it might have been a joke. In other words, I think people are very tolerant. I wouldn't go so far as to say they accept it, but they certainly tolerate it. From my experience, homophobia is rare in the City of Buenos Aires. BA is so, so diverse. Taking a walk around Once neighborhood, you'll run into transsexual hairdressers, Jewish families, and supermarkets run by Chinese citizens all in the same block. With that said, not all of Argentina is this way, and I think it might get a bit more complicated in the provinces.

2. There really isn't a gay ghetto in Buenos Aires. We're all over the place, from San Telmo, to Congreso, to Palermo, to Belgrano. I wouldn't say there is anyone one "gay neighborhood." It just doesn't exist in Buenos Aires. Maybe others have different opinions.

3. Running any business in Argentina would have to be a nightmare. One member on the forum had tremendous issues with corrupt city inspectors, and he decided to close down his business. I believe there are some gay foreigners who own a gay bar (fantastic drinks!) in Microcentro called "Flux." I think they've been shut down too after one of those famous city inspections. I, personally, don't have any experience, and wouldn't want any... but that's just me.

Good luck with your decision. Feel free to PM me if you have any other questions.

 

[Davidglen77]

I'm gay and from the U.S. I'm married to an Argentine.

3. Running any business in Argentina would have to be a nightmare. One member on the forum had tremendous issues with corrupt city inspectors, and he decided to close down his business. I believe there are some gay foreigners who own a gay bar (fantastic drinks!) in Microcentro called "Flux." I think they've been shut down too after one of those famous city inspections. I, personally, don't have any experience, and wouldn't want any... but that's just me.

I am the person who had the nightmare experience with the corrupt city inspectors and decided to close down my business because of it. On the positive side of things, my business was profitable and well liked, however having to pay bribes to stay open really bothered me and because I didn't play the game I got shut down and even though I fought it and won, I decided not to keep the business open. I now know how things work here, and although I may open another business in the future, I know where to make noise and complain if I am being harassed. Burocracy here is PERVERSE to say the least.
http://www.ripoffreport.com/governm...ueno/mauricio-macri-buenos-aires-ca-d3e6d.htm

 

[celene]

My husband and I are moving to San Telmo on Friday and discovered a queer (or at least queer friendly i.e. rainbow flag in the window) place right around the corner from our soon-to-be apartment (Yay!). It wasn't open when we were walking around the neighborhood, but we'll definitely be visiting once we're living there.
There've been a couple of times when I've been hanging out with a gay couple and I didn't notice any negativity toward them from the Porteños.

 

[YanquiGallego]

I am a Spanish-American gay professional living in BA, and agree with everything that´s been said but personally don´t think that the ¨pushing around¨ or corruption that is mentioned in business dealings is particularly related to being gay. I think if corrupt officials see ANY reason for pushing you around, they will press the issue in order to get what they want out of you.

They are like that even with Porteños. That is why you can generally sense a more authoritative ¨canchero¨ tone.

Buenos Aires Capital itself is extremely cosmopolitan and tolerant, however if you go outside of BA, even to other large cities like Cordoba, you will not find this to be the case. My ex partner, an Argentine UBA psychologist in his late 20´s was not out to his ¨provincia¨ family and scared to death of his parents finding out we were living together so much so that I was not able to even answer our apartment´s land line.

 

[gaycoupleconsideringBsAs]

Thank you for the replies so far guys!

For three years we have been travelling to each other every seven weeks and often going to third countries for a week at a time. Let me tell you it is pretty tiring and doesn't get easier with the passage of time, In truth the sense of separation becomes more profound.

I am glad BsAs appears to be at least tolerant, we are both used to that in our respective cities. I think it is a natural by-product of megacities, there is an anonymity that crystallises into a live and let live attitude.

The business idea in truth might be a bit of a romantic notion, I often see things that work in London that I think would work in SF and vice versa, and I thought that it might be as easy to spot an idea that would work in BsAs too. We are both into our food and drink so that seemed like a logical thing to explore.

We would probably rent out our respective properties and I was wondering how easy it would be to receive the rent into Argentina, are there currency controls that mean we would have to change to Pesos at the border?

Thanks again for your assistance. Oh David, I think you are very honourable to stand up to these government goons. I suspect many don't and thus exacerbate the problem. If you do stand up to them, do you think they would give up on you as a waste of time or would they torture you repeatedly until you are forced to close anyway?

 

[Davidglen77]

Oh David, I think you are very honourable to stand up to these government goons. I suspect many don't and thus exacerbate the problem. If you do stand up to them, do you think they would give up on you as a waste of time or would they torture you repeatedly until you are forced to close anyway?

Thanks for your vote of confidence. I actually closed my business because they still did harass me even after I made public what they did although much less than before. I now have a major lawsuit against the city government of Buenos Aires. It's already been through the first phase and the judge was not at all amused by what they had done to me. So the judge removed the case out from the city of Buenos Aires court system and passed it over to the national justice system, and since the city government and the national government are major enemies the lawyers think I have a very good chance of winning (they took the case solely on a contingency basis). Furthermore the file on my business is FULL of administrative errors made by the government control agency which has made them look like clowns in front of the judge. Good luck to you guys!

 

[arlean]

Well I'm not a guy and I'm NOT tolerant. But there isn't much you can do about it. Lots of people just say nothing but they have their own ideas and their own revulsion but they go on with their lives and try not to notice. I normally don't say anything but if somebody asks they'll get an honest answer.

 

[CarverFan]

Ha, ha, Arlean. Sounds like you got out of the wrong side of the bed this morning. Have a happy pill...

 

[Quaho]

i think u guys are gonna be fine here, just try to not have sex in parks , or dont go out dressed like a woman( or if u do try to look like one). kissing in public isnt nice either if you can 'supress' your instincts for a while.

Gl