I was called a racist!

[Davidglen77]

Back in October, my partner and I went back to visit my hometown, New York City. In the months before we went on the trip, I filled him in on certain aspects of life in NYC, one of the issues being race relations. How hispanic in NYC is a totally different concept than in Argentina, how black people and white people used to live in separate neighborhoods but are now more integrated, and racial sensitivity as they used to call it in "Human Resources" back at the bank where I worked was a very important issue. We saw the movie "Precious" a short time before we traveled, and in one of the scenes "precious" went into a fried chicken restaurant and ordered a bucket of chicken and walked down 125th Street eating fried chicken. I explained to him that "fried chicken" is soul food and that down south, where most American blacks (african americans) originate from "fried chicken" is a commonly prepared food. I also told him never to ask a black person if they want fried chicken or watermelon, as those are stereotypes and can be taken as an insult. We even went to a soul food restaurant in Harlem when we were in New York, ate fried catfish, BBQ Ribs, black eyed peas, collard greens and red-velvet cake. My partner liked the soul food better than any other cuisine we ate!
Anyway I have a friend here who is from Chicago, he is white by the way and my partner told him that I told him about the fried chicken and watermelon thing I told him about, and my friend got REALLY angry and said "I didn't realize you were such a racist" I couldn't believe it. I in no way was intending to be racist, I simply explained the reality of how it's important to be sensitive and not insult anybody by a seemingly innocent sentence. Does anybody else thing I was being racist by mentioning the fried chicken issue?

 

[gpop]

Race vs. culture. There's that notion of the "over-compensating white man". Anyone growing up in the 70's had more exposure to Afrocentric culture that in previous generations... some went a bit too far and thus the WHITE GUILT.

David, this person is putting on a show, nothing more. He feels better about himself by "defending" but not understanding the context of what you were relating to your partner so that he could understand.

 

[surfing]

David, I suspect your friend from Chicago is simply a prig. It's not about you; it's about him. CHEERS

 

[Napoleon]

Race vs. culture. There's that notion of the "over-compensating white man". Anyone growing up in the 70's had more exposure to Afrocentric culture that in previous generations... some went a bit too far and thus the WHITE GUILT.

David, this person is putting on a show, nothing more. He feels better about himself by "defending" but not understanding the context of what you were relating to your partner so that he could understand.

Your "friend" is a perfect example of entry #101 in the book/website "Stuff White People Like"-

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/28/101-being-offended/

My sister is like this too. She gets really pissy if the subject of Japanese culture or people are brought up and the topic of conversation isn't 100% glowing. Her best friend from college (who my sister still worships) is of Japanese decent and my sister is often "offended for her".

I asked my sister if this friend of hers has ever, EVER wasted her own time being "offended for my sister". (Short answer is "NO!")

I also have a friend I grew up with who loves to be offended for black people, because he thinks that he's "looking out for them" or maybe "has their back".

I love OFFENDING people of all races, creeds, sexual "preferences", age, perversions, disabilities... But then I'm quick to point out that I have Facebook friends who fall into the category of people that I just offended.

PS- Your friend is a tool.

PPS- I'm going to Chicago in August and I'd really love the opportunity to smack your friend around a little. I'll probably PM you to get contact info for said tool in the days leading up to my trip. Suerte y besos chico

 

[Crema Americana]

Race sensitivity has gotten to a stupid point in the US... but some people just like to get indignant about anything.

Don't worry, I've been called a racist as well. People who throw that term around loosely cheapen its true meaning.


The stereotype exists and all you were doing was informing your partner... not encouraging the stereotype, nor promoting a negative attitude towards soul food (which most people enjoy) or towards blacks. Nobody was harmed by what you said nor would it cause any future harm to anyone. We all try to warn our loved ones of things not to say or do in certain company because it may be taken the wrong way. Apparently, don't talk about race or black people around your Chicago friend.

 

[nlaruccia]

Tell your friend from Chicago this story that happened to my family. I grew up in the country in the base of the mountains and my Italian/Argentine family always ate watermelon for breakfast in the summer on the porch. One morning my mother's best friend, who happens to be African American, dropped by and cracked up when she saw us. She said "I thought only black people ate watermelon for breakfast." Does that make her racist.....against her own race? Your friend from Chicago needs to lighten up.

 

[Davidglen77]

Thanks everybody for your wonderful insight and support. I had never been called racist before, and really got taken back by that. I grew up in a multi-cultural household (russian/cuban) where everybody (except me) spoke english with a really heavy accent and while I wouldn't say my family was discriminiated against, my grandparents would sometimes be laughed at when they spoke or people would speak REALLY LOUD to them thinking they would understand them better. Since we were white many people thought it was strange that we spoke spanish, as in New York at the time people who were spanish speaking usually had darker skin than us and we would get comments like "are you guys really puerto rican?" And we never got offended at any of the questions! And my partner has a cousin (from here) who married a guy from South Carolina and she now lives there. When she moved there her neighbor said "oh could you make me some tacos and guacamole?" and she thought that was really funny and didn't get offended either. People have to lighten up!

 

[nikad]

David, were you fearing that living in Argentina had turned you into a nazi?

 

[Davidglen77]

David, were you fearing that living in Argentina had turned you into a nazi?

I don't fear becoming a Nazi, however I am definitely starting to go crazy but not radical jajajaa

 

[stefano]

Your "friend" is a perfect example of entry #101 in the book/website "Stuff White People Like"-



PS- Your friend is a tool.

Correction... Your friend is a stool.