Nice forum - but why do you beat each other up?

[arockwell11]

This is a nice, informative forum when you're NOT beating each other up.

Having lived in corporate business all my life I learned early on, never put anything in writing that you don't want to see posted on the bulletin board or forwarded to your president.

So, why do you beat each other up?

Why do you say things in a forum you wouldn't say face to face over a drink?

Why do you waste your time replying and arguing over some posts? My personal favorite lately is "How silly some expats can be?" or something like that. I'm NOT making fun of the person who posted this or the people replied, I'm only asking why are you getting wound up over this?

It seems to me that replying to "How silly some expats can be" might be an example of how silly some expats can be? So why do it? If you were at a party and someone said annoying things, you'll look for better conversation elsewhere. No?

So, if your first reaction is to attack me, please don't. You'll only be supporting my case. Perhaps a discussion on the return to what the forum was intended to be, would be a better and more productive discussion. I wasn't there in the beginning, so perhaps beating each other up was the purpose of the forum? You decide.

 

[Davidglen77]

Great post!

 

[BKK to BA]

We had a similar forum of expats living in Thailand and by comparison this is a very friendly forum...just my $.02

 

[va2ba]

I agree with you 100%. That is the one thing that really turns me off about this forum. I came on here hoping to meet some people in the city, but seeing all the pointless fighting gives me second thoughts about that.

 

[KatharineAnn]

I only argue on this forum when I feel like someone is misinforming those who may not know as much and I would like to contest what, in my opinion, is misinformation. That said, I would also contest the misinformation in person over drinks...but that's my personality

I think that if you want to say silly things on here I think that's great. Do what you want. I also think it's sad when people get truly upset over these things. A little bit of debate isn't bad for anybody, I don't think!

 

[Davidglen77]

Also, a lot of what is expressed here are simply points of view and opinions not fact or fiction.......

 

[argsteve]

Good point.. there are some angry people on here..... expats and locals...
people say their point and sometimes are ridiculed for it....
I mean you want people to have a open forum to talk.... but sometimes the comments are not helpful and more on the mean or hurtful side.
I dont want to live in a 100% "PC" world .. but you do have a point!!!!! ... sometimes you go through 10 postings people just fighting back and forth or making fun of the the person who wrote the thread......
For example, I remember a thread about a person wanting info about doctors for liposuction down here.. and a person wrote back something like ... why dont you eat better and you wont be so fat!!.....
you want this site to inform and be fun... but not mean

It is a site I believe to help, meet and inform people.........

 

[orwellian]

Why do you say things in a forum you wouldn't say face to face over a drink?

I wouldn't meet most people on this forum for a drink. The only thing we have in common is that we are expats. And that's hardly a reason to hang out with someone.
Also, the reason people use harsh language is because they can. They can call you and idiot without getting punched in their face. So some of them do (you know who you are).

and a person wrote back something like ... why dont you eat better and you wont be so fat!!.....
...
It is a site I believe to help, meet and inform people.........

Nobody said that in the thread. I did however point out that liposuction was just a temporal solution and that it isn't a good idea to lose fat.
Similarly if someone posted a thread on how to commit suicide, I would advice against it as well. That is called helping people, like you just said this forum is all about.

 

[arockwell11]

Argsteve, you are absolutely correct, people should be able to express themselves on this forum without Political Correctness.

BUT, why throw politeness, normal courtesy, and respect out the window? People should imagine that they are having this conversation in personal and not through anonymity of the internet. What's wrong with being respectful to each other?

There are lot's way ways to tell someone to go to hell and they enjoy the trip.

 

[tangobob]

Usualy the negative posters have no idea about the person they are ridiculing. For instance one guy said I was brought up on potatoes and then said I was living on Daddys money. Sort of a make your own mind up moment.
In saying all that I quite enjoy the insults I get, I know that they cannot hurt me, and because they do not know me they cannot mean them.
It is always good to get a chance to answer ignorance with interlect.