Long-termers, how do you deal with being homesick?

[SaraSara]

SSR makes a great point "trying to hard". It can really come across very disingenuous. I've met more than my fair share of "more local than local" foreigners.

The funny thing is that many locals try to act like foreigners - they dress like they imagine Americans do, and use the wrong words. I hear them speaking atrocious English-school English in Buquebus, and murdering the language.

For instance: they love the word WOW, but they spell it GUAU, (as in Guau Guau, the Spanish version of a dog barking Whoof whoof).

Something fashionable, or "cool", is called "highbrow".

Cashmere is called Bremer - as if it were a fiber: Hecho de Bremer. After the Braemer brand cashmere sweaters.

And there are lots more.

 

[Alzinho]

Capoeira lessons are probably a better option!

But capoeira is Brasilian?

At least mugging is......oh never mind!

 

[KatharineAnn]

The funny thing is that many locals try to act like foreigners - they dress like they imagine Americans do, and use the wrong words. I hear them speaking atrocious English-school English in Buquebus, and murdering the language.

For instance: they love the word WOW, but they spell it GUAU, (as in Guau Guau, the Spanish version of a dog barking Whoof whoof).

Something fashionable, or "cool", is called "highbrow".

Cashmere is called Bremer - as if it were a fiber: Hecho de Bremer. After the Braemer brand cashmere sweaters.

And there are lots more.

I'm not sure "wow" is necessarily an English word, or that "guau" isn't a "spanish" word. Is it even a word? It's just a sound, like "ahh" or "ohhh" :-D

Anyway, you're right, and I really don't understand why English is sooo cool....Here's some of my favorites:

Sorry!
Es muy heavy!
Es un crack!
Estamos a full!
Hubo un delay.
Me prestás tu pen? (flash drive, not pen!)
Vamos a un after.
Fue un shock muy grande!
And the list can go on and on!!! Sometimes the expression has nothing to DO with the meaning in English! like 'hacer playback'. Where does that come from??

 

[AnnaOlivia]

Hello, I see that you have a lot of responses and I totally understand wher eyou are coming from. I am planning to move to Argentina this year within the next few months. I have lived there for a year and been there 9 times to visit. I absolutely love the country...despite many of the problemas I have had there.

Right now I live in Peru and compared to Argentina it's not so high on my list. I have lived in Peru for 1 1/2 years, along with living in South America for 2 other years of my life. But I have been there, feeling lonely and away from the family. I have my expat friends who are wonderful and they are also leaving Peru. But something just keeps me here...in South America. Just remember that NO, you did not FAIL. You made it to where you wanted to be and that's really important for YOU to know.

I would honestly love to move to Argentina right now, if it weren't for the monetary problems in Peru, but I can't. I wish I could be ina place that I really enjoyed. And I think that YOU are in a place that you enjoy. I thought a lot about returning to the US when I was really down about everything in Peru, and then I realized that it wouldn't get better if I were home in the US. It wouldn't be the same. Things just don't stay the same. When you go back things are different, people have moved on and you realize that you are also alone in THAT world as well...to some extent.

Anywho, these are just some ideas that I thought I would share with you. Sounds like you need to hear some uplifting words adn realize that you aren't the only one in this boat. It's natural.

The list making helps, the pros and cons, just make sure you know where you want to be and think about everything you have learned on the way.

If you want, shoot me an email. Good luck and cuidáte mucho.!!!!

Nos estamos hablando...
Annita

 

[HowardinBA]

Hello, I see that you have a lot of responses and I totally understand wher eyou are coming from. I am planning to move to Argentina this year within the next few months. I have lived there for a year and been there 9 times to visit. I absolutely love the country...despite many of the problemas I have had there.

Right now I live in Peru and compared to Argentina it's not so high on my list. I have lived in Peru for 1 1/2 years, along with living in South America for 2 other years of my life. But I have been there, feeling lonely and away from the family. I have my expat friends who are wonderful and they are also leaving Peru. But something just keeps me here...in South America. Just remember that NO, you did not FAIL. You made it to where you wanted to be and that's really important for YOU to know.

I would honestly love to move to Argentina right now, if it weren't for the monetary problems in Peru, but I can't. I wish I could be ina place that I really enjoyed. And I think that YOU are in a place that you enjoy. I thought a lot about returning to the US when I was really down about everything in Peru, and then I realized that it wouldn't get better if I were home in the US. It wouldn't be the same. Things just don't stay the same. When you go back things are different, people have moved on and you realize that you are also alone in THAT world as well...to some extent.

Anywho, these are just some ideas that I thought I would share with you. Sounds like you need to hear some uplifting words adn realize that you aren't the only one in this boat. It's natural.

The list making helps, the pros and cons, just make sure you know where you want to be and think about everything you have learned on the way.

If you want, shoot me an email. Good luck and cuidáte mucho.!!!!

Nos estamos hablando...
Annita

I totally agree with you Annita

 

[citygirl]

Just wanted to say thank you to everyone for the responses, PMs, etc. It's enormously helpful to hear all of your comments and it's great to know there is such a supportive community here - I truly appreciate it.

I'm giving myself until the end of the year to make a final decision. If nothing has changed and I'm still feeling down about being so far away, then I'll make the decision to move somewhere - whether that's back to the US or on to a new location for new adventures, I have no idea. But in the meantime, I am forcing myself to get outside of my comfort zone and to really engage in life here and not be shy about things.

Re: making local friendships - it's great advice but really, that's much easier said than done. As a woman in my 30s - there are fairly limited options. Most porteñas my age are married, with kids and our lifestyles aren't exactly compatible. For example, I had a very dear friend here who was single when I moved here. We were together all the time. She is now married and lives in the suburbs. I see her maybe 1x a month now for a coffee. And that's been my experience quite frequently - as soon as someone has a partner, they disappear. And frienships btwn men and women here are not exactly the norm. I find that it's usually couples that go out together or get invited places so as a singleton, I'm usually excluded. I'm not making excuses, just sharing my experiences. And I'm a very social person and not exactly shy.

Anyway, thanks again to everyone.

 

[flippinkittin]

I have been living in Buenos Aires since Aug of 2007. I miss home greatly, but appreciate the fact that I can go and visit for a month at a time and then come back to my normal life here in Buenos Aires. I still struggle a lot with 'home-sickness' but convincing friends and family to visit you is better than you visiting them because then they can be happy about your life choice once they experience the great things BA has to offer. This thread reminded me of a web comic called achewood. Warning this strip is a little on the sad side but very pertinent to this thread "home is not a place, it is a time"

 

[Ailujjj]

Here's a quote I've always liked that a friend (who has been an expat in the UK for nearly a decade) has on her fb profile :

I would not know how to instil a taste for adventure in those who have not acquired it. (Anyway, who can ever prove the necessity for the gypsy life?) And yet there are people who suddenly tear themselves away from their comfortable existence and, using the energy' of their bodies as an example to their brains, apply themselves to the discovery of unsuspected pleasures and places. -- Pierre Elliot Trudeau

I think, ultimately, that while homesickness and being away will always be hard - for some people, that need to colour outside the lines in action not just in thought will always be there. There's a trade-off to leaving your safety/ home turf and those who are there, but at the end of the day... I'd rather be me than those who are there. Knowing they are there is part of what gives you the ability/security to venture away.

 

[texxaslonghorn]

Hey citygirl, I lived there with my ARG wife for a little over a year in 2006-07, and you are one of the people whos posts I remember reading.

Anyway, I hope you ended up staying??? Or whatever makes/made you happy. We are probably moving back soon. Can't wait!

 

[Zackdotcom]

I've been here a month speak zero Spanish and can tell you every and i mean every Argentine that lives here and speaks English wants to leave too... Women even more than men, and thats a pool of over 100 people i have met! You are not alone!