Mentally Ill Neighbor

[Cecil Fox Palmer]

Hey-oh, I'd like a bit of non-urgent advice, if anyone cares to help.

Some weeks ago I moved to a really nice apartment. I quickly realized that there is some noise coming from upstairs. I constantly hear things falling over and banging about, and what seems to be either one or two dogs running around and barking very loudly. I'm not much of a dog person and could never understand how anyone could live with yappy, untrained animals, but I really couldn't care less about these things since I lived for over 3 years near el Centro and got all sorts of noise all day and all night. I'm a deep sleeper so it's all good.

What's not so good is that whoever lives up there seems to be a bit nuts. Every few days I hear a lady screaming, crying, and slamming doors. I can hear word for word everything that she screams. She says things like, "I hate you, I swear I'm going to kill you, I want to leave and you won't let me," etc. Then she cries hysterically. Once I even heard glass being smashed and then swept up. In the few weeks that I've been here, I've witnessed it maybe 5 or 6 times, always between 8 and 10 in the morning, a time when I'm still in bed.

While I'm not mad yet, I'm thinking that this will probably get very old, very soon. I was thinking that maybe I could try to call the police about domestic violence, since that's what I would do if I were in my country, but I don't know if the police answers to that type of call here (todo bien porteños, but y'all are weird). I've also never heard another voice, so it's completely possible that she's just yelling at no one (and would also explain how someone could put up with another person threatening to kill him every other morning) or that she's yelling at the animal(s). I'm not suffering or losing sleep over this, but I do feel bad for this woman who is probably ill, for the dog(s) who, as sensitive as they are, get worked up over loud noises, and for anyone else that might live up there.

So, what would you do about this?

Oh yeah, I'm Fox and I'm a newbie to the boards. It's nice to meet everyone.

 

[Crema Americana]

Sounds like she's arguing with the dogs.

There's a few things you can try, but if you truly have a neighbor with mental illness there may not be much of a solution.

You can complain to the landlord or building president... or go directly to the neighbor (though that may not be the best idea.) Maybe ask the portero or another neighbor what's the deal with the person living above you. You're probably not the only one that hears it.

If it happens again and sounds bad, you wouldn't be wrong to call the police - the response may be questionable, but worth a shot. I wouldn't claim domestic violence without knowing... just say the truth that you hear screaming and what sounds like a fight.

If it continues, you may have to find another apartment.

 

[Matt84]

She might be on the phone, that's why you only hear one voice, and the dogs might be acting up on her stress. Unless the noise is seriously bothering you I'd just consider it normal life in the city! the things I've heard from neighbors...
If she's preventing your from sleep or if you're feeling more than negative but real violent vibes, maybe first try and talk to a neighbor that might know a little bit more of the story?

 

[polostar88]

Crazy people can't control themselves. (You also shouldn't call the cops out of concern for someone else who could have called them by now herself if she wanted. If it is "abuse," she probably enjoys the drama, as happens so often.) It is possible she is talking to disembodied spirits also, and is being harassed by various demonic entities.

Regardless, if I were you I would leave. You can find many good apts. relatively cheap now all over BsAs. Why put up with this? Know that crazy people will continue doing what they do. I would have moved after the third time maybe, it's obvious this will continue. If your landlord is reasonable they will let you go pro-rated and return deposit.

 

[Matt84]

if your landlord is reasonable they will let you go pro-rated and return deposit.

It's Buenos Aires expats not Bel Air expats. Landlords are less fresh.

 

[Cecil Fox Palmer]

Hey, thanks for the advice. Like I said, so far it hasn't really taken a toll on me, I'm just concerned about the well being of whoever lives up there. I know that porteños can be dramatic, but to scream and cry everyday, it's just too much.

I don't think she is arguing with the dogs. They sound like more relationship fights ("no me podés hacer esto, te odio, te juro que te voy a matar"). I have heard her going down the stairs with the noisy dog. She takes it out for walks every day. I took a peek at it and it looked healthy, just untrained. If I ever hear what sounds like animal abuse, I would call someone immediately.

Also, I don't care if the lady is being abused and doesn't consider it abuse or if she is verbally abusing someone else who would rather stay quiet: abuse is abuse and it should be reported. I do understand that police cannot do anything if the person is not willing to make a denuncia.

I have hardly ever seen anyone downstairs. I don't know who the encargado/portero is. I have seen someone doing some type of construction work in the lobby, I might ask this person and try to ask about the lady without making too much fuss. Also, I could bring it up with the owner to see if she can give me some advice, but of course, she doesn't control who lives in the other apartments and she doesn't live here, so she wouldn't know the extent of it. I really like my new pad and i hate moving so I'll do my best to keep it for a while.

 

[garryl]

Maybe just a lonely neighbor. perhaps you can bring a bottle of wine to tell him/her to be quiet, this could be crazy,
One time there was a water leak from above, I went upstairs to talk to the women living above my apartment, she was very nice about it. Next day I brought a bottle of nice wine to thank her, was thinking to just drop the wine and leave, but amazingly, she was very touched, she was renting, no one really talks to her and brings wine to her in the building, she invited me in and asked me to share the wine with her, she is an attractive intelligent woman, half Argentine half French, speaks very good English too, we had a great conversation. You never know what you get, attractive people or mental patient, or both.

 

[GS_Dirtboy]

Do what we country folks do; take her a casserole and be neighborly. Start to develop a relationship. Once you have that then you have an excuse to check on her when you hear things breaking.

 

[syngirl]

We had neighbours above us in Las Cañitas who fought like crazy, it got so bad that I actually feared he would kill her. One day they were screaming at each other and we heard him chasing her around the apartment. Being below them I couldn't.see what was happening, but I looked out the window and could see a few people across the street looking to see what was happening, the argument was that loud. my husband called the police, they were there in less than 10mins, obviously they had sent one of the patrol cars from near the restaurants, but it was good to know they do respond. We didn't have to leave a name, just gave them the address, and when they came they made them both come down, then questioned him in the street and took her back upstairs I assume to inspect the apartment. He moved shortly thereafter.

 

[Cecil Fox Palmer]

Interesting, I'll give the good neighbor card a try.