Argentine wifes inches from getting the boot

[Pensador]

She is taking on the typical head in the sand position. I have done everything to protect and keep things locked down here. We are friends with a block away neighbor who has a teenager who is still just living like nothing is going on, friends in and out etc and I know in that house they are zero defensive measures. The family is well known here lots of local friends people in and out all the time as well. For me it is a high risk environment and I have even tried to explain things to them. Typical no pasa nada response, I hope they are right. These are good friends always wonderful people but at this time just not a place to hang out.

Yesterday wife says, I am going for a walk and I asked are going to see your friend. No she says no, as she knows I wont go in their house and have asked her not do so at this time. While she is out for her supposed walk. I finished disinfecting some things and then went to take the trash from the day to dumpster. Just so happens our friends son is taking the trash out as well at the same time. He informs me my wife in the house with his mother having a tea. I try to call the friend as my wife left her cell here no answer and they know they are busted I am sure. Her friend knows I do not want her in the house as well. I suppose they think it is like some sneaky girls things and that paranoid crazy gringo is just over reacting to all this.

To think all I have to done and the measures taken could be so easily taken down with a touch of deceptive carelessness. Blew me away and wow was I hot I mean just off the charts frustrated. Thinking here I done have so much work and put so much effort into securing us and the house and everything only to be under minded by my partner.

Spent the morning on AIRBNB looking for a place to put her for several months. Lots of places near by and very affordable given the the current situation. That might be the best temporary solution. Yet even that would require the use resources that might be needed before all this is over. But then again what use would resources be if the it got me due to careless and clueless relationships.

Hard decisions to made this day for sure.

 

[sts7049]

that paranoid crazy gringo is just over reacting to all this.

Spent the morning on AIRBNB looking for a place to put her for several months.

this made me laugh, sorry

i mean, the truth is these days we are all only as good as our weakest links. that's how i see it anyway.

 

[cbbsas]

I feel your pain, I too would be furious. I have had a couple of similar conversations - I'm sure every couple has. Perhaps show your wife an article - not one of those awful youtube videos - but something like this: https://www.bbc.com/news/video_and_...cribes-the-trauma-of-husband-being-in-an-icu?

 

[Fiscal]

Yikes

 

[Pierre Smith]

You're being very paranoid.

I guess I might as well tell my story.

Our office here in California was hit with Covid 19 the first week of March. Only 1 of 26 people had symptoms worrying enough visit the hospital, our receptionist, who is in her late 50s. It was her positive test that got our office closed and made us all aware that our sudden illness was this coronavirus, made us stay home for 2 weeks. The doctors said that given the nature of our frequent collaborations and contact, close work proximity, etc. and that so many of us exhibited symptoms, we should all assume that we were infected.

Symptoms: I had chest pain and a cough (that was somewhat painful, because of the underlying chest pain) for 3-4 days, and slightly impacted breathing for another 3-4 days. My assistant had a sore throat for a couple days. The major feeling that everyone had was unusual-to-severe fatigue. I mean, tough to stay awake during the day fatigue - about 14 people reported this, including me. This was the dominant feeling of Covid 19 for us.

Of the 26 people in our office who were exposed and presumed infected, we had 1 positive test, 4 with significant symptoms (including me), and 14 exhibiting symptoms of any kind. The others were asymptomatic.

This leads me to conclude 3 things:

1) This virus is already lot more widespread than people realize, the 1 positive test result represents 26 office exposures, plus a very large number of community exposures by all of us, before we realized we were infected. By one estimate, our 26 people probably infected another 91 people, so that 1 positive test here could mean 117 infected. Once we have a good antibodies test, we're going to realize that a lot of us really overreacted;
2) Measuring the positive test to death ratio does not get at all close to measuring the deadliness of this virus. Almost by definition, the only people to get tested will be those who are worst hit by the virus, so that we're getting a snapshot of the deadliness of the virus on those who most ill; and
3) It's just not that bad of a disease for the VAST majority of people who are exposed to it. In the case of our office's exposure, we had 0 deaths and a total of 2 hospital days (our receptionist), which were for observation.

Basically, my point here is that driving yourself crazy with paranoia and fear, and/or throwing your wife out or divorcing her or whatever because she just refuses to go crazy with you - from my perspective and anecdotal experience, these are very very irrational actions.

Take basic precautions to 'flatten the curve' and preserve medical resources for those who will be hard hit by this virus when it gets to them, but know that this isn't the black plague you're dealing with here.

 

[on the brink]

Some people have trouble believing the danger is real. I have a friend in Chubut - no cases in the province yet - who shops at different stores three times a day, and chatting with the cashiers. Hard to believe in the pandemic, without a single case in a 500 km radius.

 

[EL_TIGRE_de_Tigre]

She is taking on the typical head in the sand position. I have done everything to protect and keep things locked down here. We are friends with a block away neighbor who has a teenager who is still just living like nothing is going on, friends in and out etc and I know in that house they are zero defensive measures. The family is well known here lots of local friends people in and out all the time as well. For me it is a high risk environment and I have even tried to explain things to them. Typical no pasa nada response, I hope they are right. These are good friends always wonderful people but at this time just not a place to hang out.

Yesterday wife says, I am going for a walk and I asked are going to see your friend. No she says no, as she knows I wont go in their house and have asked her not do so at this time. While she is out for her supposed walk. I finished disinfecting some things and then went to take the trash from the day to dumpster. Just so happens our friends son is taking the trash out as well at the same time. He informs me my wife in the house with his mother having a tea. I try to call the friend as my wife left her cell here no answer and they know they are busted I am sure. Her friend knows I do not want her in the house as well. I suppose they think it is like some sneaky girls things and that paranoid crazy gringo is just over reacting to all this.

To think all I have to done and the measures taken could be so easily taken down with a touch of deceptive carelessness. Blew me away and wow was I hot I mean just off the charts frustrated. Thinking here I done have so much work and put so much effort into securing us and the house and everything only to be under minded by my partner.

Spent the morning on AIRBNB looking for a place to put her for several months. Lots of places near by and very affordable given the the current situation. That might be the best temporary solution. Yet even that would require the use resources that might be needed before all this is over. But then again what use would resources be if the it got me due to careless and clueless relationships.

Hard decisions to made this day for sure.

I read your post once and it caught my attention. Then twice and I saw an earlier version of myself. Finally a third time, because I really wanted to fully understand things. And now I think I do. I know your point of view, PERFECTLY. And at one time in the past, I recognize me in your place. So I think I can speak from experience on this one:

What is most important to you? Working to stay ahead of the germs or having your wife in your life? I surely hope it is the latter as opposed to the former. Mind you, I am not focusing on the seriousness of it all, in that there is a potentially deadly virus out there, that is real. Or her lying to you about where she was going or intending to do. I am focussing on the relationship and urging you to MAINTAIN it at just about any cost if you truly love your wife and want her to be in your life.

There is a possibility, you and or your wife could die due to her being the weak link with respect to contracting, then spreading the virus among your selves. I get that. And I am sure you want to live, I get that as well. I fully understand your anger and disappointment with your wife. Clearly she has different values and, or a different fear level than you. Or perhaps she is not as aware or care as much as you do. BUT - Make no mistake about it all, she has a differing point of view than yours. And no matter what you do or say is going to change that. As a matter of fact, if you keep at it, you very well may drive her away.

Your choice is a simple one. Fear the virus, most likely live to be an old man or choose to love your wife ... faults and all.

I know what choice I would make every single time.

Long life without love is not worth living it.

 

[Pensador]

You're being very paranoid.

I guess I might as well tell my story.

Our office here in California was hit with Covid 19 the first week of March. Only 1 of 26 people had symptoms worrying enough visit the hospital, our receptionist, who is in her late 50s. It was her positive test that got our office closed and made us all aware that our sudden illness was this coronavirus, made us stay home for 2 weeks. The doctors said that given the nature of our frequent collaborations and contact, close work proximity, etc. and that so many of us exhibited symptoms, we should all assume that we were infected.

Symptoms: I had chest pain and a cough (that was somewhat painful, because of the underlying chest pain) for 3-4 days, and slightly impacted breathing for another 3-4 days. My assistant had a sore throat for a couple days. The major feeling that everyone had was unusual-to-severe fatigue. I mean, tough to stay awake during the day fatigue - about 14 people reported this, including me. This was the dominant feeling of Covid 19 for us.

Of the 26 people in our office who were exposed and presumed infected, we had 1 positive test, 4 with significant symptoms (including me), and 14 exhibiting symptoms of any kind. The others were asymptomatic.

This leads me to conclude 3 things:

1) This virus is already lot more widespread than people realize, the 1 positive test result represents 26 office exposures, plus a very large number of community exposures by all of us, before we realized we were infected. By one estimate, our 26 people probably infected another 91 people, so that 1 positive test here could mean 117 infected. Once we have a good antibodies test, we're going to realize that a lot of us really overreacted;
2) Measuring the positive test to death ratio does not get at all close to measuring the deadliness of this virus. Almost by definition, the only people to get tested will be those who are worst hit by the virus, so that we're getting a snapshot of the deadliness of the virus on those who most ill; and
3) It's just not that bad of a disease for the VAST majority of people who are exposed to it. In the case of our office's exposure, we had 0 deaths and a total of 2 hospital days (our receptionist), which were for observation.

Basically, my point here is that driving yourself crazy with paranoia and fear, and/or throwing your wife out or divorcing her or whatever because she just refuses to go crazy with you - from my perspective and anecdotal experience, these are very very irrational actions.

Take basic precautions to 'flatten the curve' and preserve medical resources for those who will be hard hit by this virus when it gets to them, but know that this isn't the black plague you're dealing with here.

I am glad this went well for you in the end. My aunt and uncle came down with it in SoCal two weeks ago they both ended up in ICU my uncle did not make it my aunt is now a widow.

 

[EL_TIGRE_de_Tigre]

I am glad this went well for you in the end. My aunt and uncle came down with it in SoCal two weeks ago they both ended up in ICU my uncle did not make it my aunt is now a widow.

I am truly sorry to read that. I do understand your point of view before and after this latest post of yours.

 

[Pierre Smith]

Ah damn, I'm very sorry to hear that. I can see why you're so paranoid.

Assuming you're on the younger side, the overwhelming likelihood is that this disease does not pose a risk to you or your wife. But, I can definitely see why you wouldn't want to take any risks.