Boring expats

[qwerty]

Ahhhhhh finally Querty!!! Somebody had to say it! My dear hubby turned into one of those who work from home and stay at home... I guess this happens when expats move for the sole purpose of being with their bf/gf. Traveling, seeing other places, clubs, bars, sports, maybe were not their thing back home, and certainly are not their thing in BA either. The did not move to Argentina because of the country, so they are not bothered.

During the first year they are a little bit curious as to see what is out there, but then they go back to their " normal " life, as if they were back home, and if they do not come from another city, but maybe a relatively small place, they simply live in the middle of BA city chaos as if they were in a small town. It is not the money in our case tbh.

This is basically the reason why I never made it to meet any of you, my dear expat is a stay at home boy

I would say that the average expat I talk about has a much more boring life then most of my friends back home who are from a small town. I don't think it's the 'normal' thing

 

[qwerty]

If I had to guess I would say it's mostly monetary issues and it seems when you fall into routine in a long term relationship then you tend to get boring. At least that's my situation. I am actually invited to a lunch party this Friday and a farewell party this Saturday night. I think I will go but as for the lunch party I'll probably have to order the cheapest thing on the menu and as for the party I'll have just one drink.

There are lots of cheap/free things to do here too but I guess since I have a baby I am always too tired or I don't feel like going out with a baby and paying for a sitter gets expensive.

So there are my excuses for my boring life, but you know what? I kind of enjoy it. Until I got here I was one of those people that were going and going all the time, now I slowed down enough to appreciate little everyday things.

But it is true, we probably should all get out more and be a bit more social. Trying new things is what living abroad is all about.

I was not talking about expat who have a baby, that seems only normal you spend a lot more at home

I do know a expat couple who do loads of things but are mainly limited to the quiet friend at home parties because of the little girl, but that's understandable

 

[gouchobob]

I would say that the average expat I talk about has a much more boring life then most of my friends back home who are from a small town. I don't think it's the 'normal' thing

Ok, I'm assuming that since you thought about this you also have a theory why this is, are they isolated (language/cultural problems), lack transportation, etc?

 

[qwerty]

The best I can come up is that it's a lack of $$ but from many friends I know they are pretty well off(by Argentine standards, sometimes even first world standards) but still behave like I wrote in the first post.

If I compare it to my Argentine friends, who basicially come from upper middle class families, have ok jobs, little posibility of saving and are in there late 20's/ early 30's, they are much more into doing fun/different things then most of my expats friends are

 

[syngirl]

It's $$.

No one I know Argentine or foreigner is going out much these days, it's too expensive. We do dinners at home with friends rather than go out, or when we go out for dinner we tend to do cheapy restaurants.

It's also winter, when it's rainy and gross I'd rather have a glass of wine at home with some friends than go out, drive around looking for a parking spot, wait to get in somewhere, wait for service etc etc.

But I was like that back home too: summers are for sitting on patios having drinks socialising, winters are for having people over to your house to cook and stay warm. The exception was that in the winter at home I snowboarded so once a week or so we'd go after work and then go out for drinks.

 

[SaraSara]

Argentine homes are not nearly as comfortable or as roomy as American homes, and are generally cluttered with relatives. So the locals do a lot of their socializing at cafes, where they study, and meet friends to sit and talk, and talk, and talk, over a single coffee. The waiters are used to this and don't chase anyone away.

A lot of people are into sports and group activities like tai-chi classes, movie clubs, "talleres", etcetera. They also are intensely gregarious and love to do things in groups - the bigger the crowd, the better they like it. People who like solitude and enjoy doing things by themselves are regarded as a little weird.

They seem to have have enormous stamina. I've known physicians who can stay up until one in the evening, and be up at seven the next morning doing their hospital rounds.

When I first arrived at the US I was shocked party invitations specifying: "From 5 to 7 p.m." Here parties are open ended affairs, starting sometimes in late afternoon and often going well into the small hours of the morning. A birthday party is considered a success if guests have to sit two to a chair.

 

[Ashley]

I think $ has to do with it...And the cold (as far as free stuff like museums, tigre etc are concerned). I would much rather stay at home with a bottle of wine and a movie or have friends over than pay 30+ pesos for one cocktail at a nice place. I guess a lot people in their late 20s to 30s don't enjoy going out to the packed, cheaper places anymore. I feel like I did my time doing that kind of thing until I was about 26 and just can't be bothered with it anymore. However, I think a lot of people our age with similar disposable incomes are the same way regardless of where they live. I think maybe some Argentine people have bigger social networks and sometimes live with their families so have to socialise outside which could explain why you think they're generally "less boring"!

 

[SaraSara]

Last week I had lunch at the neighborhood parrilla. It was half empty, so I asked the owner if business was slower because prices had gone up. He said it was partly that, and partly that people did not eat out as much in winter as in summer. He said he had reduced his beef markup, but even so business was slow.

I don't think going out every night makes people less boring - in fact, it may make them more boring. People who stay home with a book often have more interesting things to talk about.

 

[qwerty]

It's $$.

No one I know Argentine or foreigner is going out much these days, it's too expensive. We do dinners at home with friends rather than go out, or when we go out for dinner we tend to do cheapy restaurants.

It's also winter, when it's rainy and gross I'd rather have a glass of wine at home with some friends than go out, drive around looking for a parking spot, wait to get in somewhere, wait for service etc etc.

But I was like that back home too: summers are for sitting on patios having drinks socialising, winters are for having people over to your house to cook and stay warm. The exception was that in the winter at home I snowboarded so once a week or so we'd go after work and then go out for drinks.

The after office hours do pretty good, it was never a big thing with foreigners and it's kind of office-thing but now it seems there are even less foreigners

I think that most places are as crowded on a friday or saturday as they were 5,3 or 1 year ago. I just don't see a big change there

I can go out for something like 30-50 peso and probally spend around 80 to 100 if I really have a good time. I don't think that's all that expensive, if you go out with locals you quickly spend around the same they do and that's normally not a 3 digit figure.

The typical expat bar is probally more expensive but that's mainly because nobody spends money there.

 

[SaraSara]

I can go out for something like 30-50 peso and probally spend around 80 to 100 if I really have a good time.

What do you get for thirty pesos? In my neighborhood, just coffee and a grilled sandwich.