Teen mothers and single parents

#1
Why are there so many teen pregancies and single parents in the new generation of Argentina?
I always thought it has to do with lack of (sexual) education but my girlfriend thinks that it´s because kids in Argentina stay with there parents untill there mid or late 20´s and that way they dont learn to grow up, and begin independent from there parents
What do you think?
 
#3
"Elpanada" said:
I think that there are very few teen pregnancies over there, where is this coming from?
You must have lived in a different Argentina than the one I am living in for the last 3 years.
Let´s just leave it with that

 
#4
My stupid stupid 19-year-old casi-sister-in-law is pregnant. The idiot girl and her equally stupid boyfriend are incredibly happy about this. She's never held a job in her life, never bought groceries before, never looked after a child. Are they happy because they are just so eff-ing naive about the cost of living here?
With this particular couple, she seems to think that pregnancy is her ticket to freedom from the family house. With her boyfriends 1800 pesos a month they seem to think they can rent a 1000 peso a month apartment and feed and clothe this baby.
All she sees is that a baby is going to get her what she wants -- to live with her boyfriend and move out of her parents house. She doesn't understand that she's not going to be able to maintain the style of living that she is acustomed to. She doesn't understand that a baby is a lot of work, it's no ticket to freedom. And she definitely doesn't seem to understand that there is a very real possiblity that after a couple of months of baby crying all the time and girlfriend draining all the money from the bank account, that the boyfriend is just going to split, and she's going to end up back in the family home, bebe in tow.
This I'm sure happens all the time, that's why there's all these single parents. What 20 year old guy wants to be a full-time dad when his buddies are all headed to La Diosa every weekend. As long as the guy doesn't marry the girl, her parents are still legally responsable for her until she reaches age of majority (21). So if he doesn't marry her, doesn't owe her anything -- may have to give some money for the bebe but doesn't have to give the girl sh*t.
I think the high levels of teen / young mums have to do with a combination of things --
1) Lack of good sex education,
2) Lack of legal abortion options -- you can get an abortion in Argentina no problem if you have the money, if you don't have the money, you don't have the option, so once you're pregnant, that's that.
3) Lack of serious attitude towards education and careers for women -- professional careers just aren't pursued by women in the proportions that they are in Europe or North America -- and a lot of the women that go to university still don't have any desire to use their education -- men and women here are (a lot of them) of the mentality that a woman's place is in the home (what's the German expression? Kirke-Kuche-Kinder, something like that)
4) Infantilization and general spoiling of teenage girls. This is want my In-Laws are guilty of. The girl is used to getting everything she wants handed to her on a silver platter. Result -- no clue about how difficult life can be and perception that parents will continue to support her for the rest of her life (which is more than likely what will happen). This girl thinks babies are about as much work as little dollies -- like the 15 or more dollies that she still has in her own bedroom (well at least the baby will have toys, Mummy still has all of hers so she can just give them to baby)
The worst bit about this whole situation is that my in-laws are going to end up raising this child for sure. The soon-to-be mother dropped out of school at 15 with the idea that she was going to be a ballet dancer, however now all she does is sit at home painting her nails (I should clarify that this family is middle class, university educated family, even the mother had a career in finance before the girl came along, and the girl seems to have just been spoilt her entire life and never had any limits put on her, and also never booted her out of the house and told her to get a job).
Getting knocked up was the girl's fault, but the road to getting knocked up was partly paved by her own parents -- and they are the ones that will find themselves in the worse for it.
Anyway I'm sorry, I could rant about this forever, it's pretty much the only topic of conversation in my family right now as we're just so blown away that this girl thinks that having a baby is going to be a walk in the park.
 
#6
have little to add as Syngirl has said it all.
I live in a small village, I was gobsmacked when I first came here to see the amount of young teenage girls with babies. I am talking 13/14/15 year olds.
The most shocking thing about all this is how young promiscuous people in Argentina have a problem with using profilactics. (durex ect). If the child pregnancy rate is so high how high exactly are the HIV and hepatitis statistics here in Argentina?
Obviously there are enormous problems here with health education and irresponsible parenting.
This may seem banal but the amount of freedom given to young people here is also relevant. Where else in the world do you see young girls being permitted to go out at midnight and return home at 8 in the morning.
I have had enormous problems with my two step-daughters with regard to rules. My husband admits that he and his ex-wife never made any????????????Part of this mentality I feel is down to plain laziness in parenting. It is so much easier to consent.
If my husband had any real idea what these kids actually get up to when they go "dancing" he would flip but he lives in this "bubble" that " all the kids go out until 7 in the morning and they are doing nothing but dancing. Duh!
My 18 year old daughter came over from school last September. She was really shocked when she went out to the local clubs. She told me that my husbands best friends "angelic" 15 year old daughter was "practically stripping" on a table in a bar, completely drunk and "deep throat" kissing every boy she could get her hands on! These are kids from the best families here so no comments on Gente from the "villa". Its quite relevant to note that my daughter was considered a rebel in England and thrown out of boarding school and termed by social services as "extremely vulnerable" until I adopted her 4 years ago
But then again in a country that has no laws on sexual exploitation in the media and promotes blatant sexuality (shit where in the world do you get graphic TV publicity showing girls licking cherries and orgasmically ooohhing and ahhhhing in dental floss G-strings at 11am?
where else in the world do you have thousands of sex hotels where you drive in and pay for the "turno"?
What else can I say except Argentina is a permiscuous society with no brakes!
 
#7
"syngirl" said:
My stupid stupid 19-year-old casi-sister-in-law is pregnant. The idiot girl and her equally stupid boyfriend are incredibly happy about this. She's never held a job in her life, never bought groceries before, never looked after a child. Are they happy because they are just so eff-ing naive about the cost of living here?
With this particular couple, she seems to think that pregnancy is her ticket to freedom from the family house. With her boyfriends 1800 pesos a month they seem to think they can rent a 1000 peso a month apartment and feed and clothe this baby.
I don´t know how old the boy is but 1800 peso isn´t really that bad. If your sister in law could get a 1000 peso job and some help from both parents they should do allright.
It´s no way to start a family offcourse
All she sees is that a baby is going to get her what she wants -- to live with her boyfriend and move out of her parents house. She doesn't understand that she's not going to be able to maintain the style of living that she is acustomed to. She doesn't understand that a baby is a lot of work, it's no ticket to freedom. And she definitely doesn't seem to understand that there is a very real possiblity that after a couple of months of baby crying all the time and girlfriend draining all the money from the bank account, that the boyfriend is just going to split, and she's going to end up back in the family home, bebe in tow.
That will most likely happen indeed. Is the guy responsible?
This I'm sure happens all the time, that's why there's all these single parents. What 20 year old guy wants to be a full-time dad when his buddies are all headed to La Diosa every weekend. As long as the guy doesn't marry the girl, her parents are still legally responsable for her until she reaches age of majority (21). So if he doesn't marry her, doesn't owe her anything -- may have to give some money for the bebe but doesn't have to give the girl sh*t.
With a 1800 peso job, probally 300-400 peso a month
I think the high levels of teen / young mums have to do with a combination of things --
1) Lack of good sex education,
2) Lack of legal abortion options -- you can get an abortion in Argentina no problem if you have the money, if you don't have the money, you don't have the option, so once you're pregnant, that's that.
For unknown parents or grandparents?
3) Lack of serious attitude towards education and careers for women -- professional careers just aren't pursued by women in the proportions that they are in Europe or North America -- and a lot of the women that go to university still don't have any desire to use their education -- men and women here are (a lot of them) of the mentality that a woman's place is in the home (what's the German expression? Kirke-Kuche-Kinder, something like that)
An absent of part-time jobs probally is as well a huge factor. But I do think if you get a college degree, have 4-5 years experience you could get a 6 hour a day job
4) Infantilization and general spoiling of teenage girls. This is want my In-Laws are guilty of. The girl is used to getting everything she wants handed to her on a silver platter. Result -- no clue about how difficult life can be and perception that parents will continue to support her for the rest of her life (which is more than likely what will happen). This girl thinks babies are about as much work as little dollies -- like the 15 or more dollies that she still has in her own bedroom (well at least the baby will have toys, Mummy still has all of hers so she can just give them to baby)
The worst bit about this whole situation is that my in-laws are going to end up raising this child for sure. The soon-to-be mother dropped out of school at 15 with the idea that she was going to be a ballet dancer, however now all she does is sit at home painting her nails (I should clarify that this family is middle class, university educated family, even the mother had a career in finance before the girl came along, and the girl seems to have just been spoilt her entire life and never had any limits put on her, and also never booted her out of the house and told her to get a job).
Getting knocked up was the girl's fault, but the road to getting knocked up was partly paved by her own parents -- and they are the ones that will find themselves in the worse for it.
Anyway I'm sorry, I could rant about this forever, it's pretty much the only topic of conversation in my family right now as we're just so blown away that this girl thinks that having a baby is going to be a walk in the park.
 
#8
Actually Granada brings up an interesting side-note in his mention of part-time jobs -- there really is no culture here of teenagers getting summer jobs. At home it's common, if not pretty much expected, that by 14 or 15 teenagers will take jobs during their summer holidays -- at movie theatres, restaurants, tech stores -- even babysitting (I myself paid for my tuition, books, and part of my rent by working as a nanny to 4 children throughout university -- summers only fortunately, I don't think I would have finished university if I had done it full-time!)
 
#9
You guys are talking alot about teen pregnancies in Argentina and implying that they're exceptionally common there. I personally aint gonna buy it, from what I've seen of Argentina teen pregnancies are actually probably way lower than in most countries. Does anybody have any statistics on this?
 
#10
Oops, pressed return and posted before completing a thought.
Question I want to pose: Is there a summer time job culture in your home countries? Do you think this has effects on responsibility etc amongst teenagers? (I obviously do!) And can someone explain why this idea doesn't appear to be embraced in Argentina (I know that some of it has to do with social class).
I would love to hear some more local experiences with children / teenagers here. What is the local perspective on eaching children responsibility -- both personal and financial? To me it seems to be a very laissez-fair situation, resulting in kids leaving the home in their late 20s completely unprepared to do the most menial tasks such as their laundry.
I know that in other countries as well there are a lot of problems with teenagers / kids in their 20s being spoilt and prolonging their childhoods etc. This isn't only a problem here, but I would love to here some more opinions.