Hard time making real friends

Sutterek

Registered
Hi, I am new to this site. I am from the US. Minnesota is my home state. I came to BA over a year ago because of a job opportunity and I am still working there although I am not very excited about it anymore. I am supposed to stay here until March of 2012 and I feel like I am just doing my time until it is over. I didn't speak any Spanish before I came here and my job is all in English so although I have learned I still don't really talk to anyone in Spanish. I have made some friends at work and have a roommate from Cordoba but I have not made any good connections with people who I can share with or explore the city with. I am 41 and everyone I know is younger than me and seems to enjoy very different things like night clubs whereas I would rather sit in a pub and talk or go to a play. Can anyone give me advice of how I can make connections and maybe actually enjoy the remaining time I spend here in BA?
 

majortungsten

Registered
It is a very brave thing to admit. I have the same problems...
I have been here for three months now and I am having a real hard time meeting people. I live on my own. My job as a teacher trainer means that I always speak English to my 20-odd year old students who I have to keep a professional distance from, and are only in my life for four weeks at a time and then move on. I have made a few local friends, but they have their own lives. Because of my work schedule I take private Spanish classes meaning I have not really met anyone there either.
On top of this, the fact that I despise boliches makes me feel like some sort of social outcast .
I know this isn't the "advice" you were looking for, but I guess I am just trying to say that you are not alone. There are others out there who are having as much trouble meeting people in a city of 14 million.
And if you fancy a quiet pint and a chat, drop me a line.
 

Sutterek

Registered
Yes, I have had the same experience with learning Spanish. Private lessons may be good for some but it get really sad to just be alone with one teacher all the time. I have considered finding a group but I am just not motivated enough. I will take suggestions for that too :)
 

deeve007

Registered
How would you meet friends anywhere else? It's no different here.

Go to the pub, say hello to someone. I met a local couple who have become very good friends in a bar in San Telmo, just by striking up a conversation. The husband's best friend is actual someone he also met in a bar many years ago, it's not an uncommon way to meet someone with similar interests.

Go to events like Spanglish, you'll meet both locals and ex-pats.

Go to the expat events arranged on here amongst other places.

From craigslist I've seen various social events for both English & Spanish speakers.

If you play a sport, seek out those groups.

If you have other interests (plays, reading ...etc) seek out those groups, this is a big city they exist as in any other big city.

Basically get proactive. If you can meet people and make friends elsewhere you can do it here. If you can't anywhere, then that's another issue altogether.
 

BA_Life

Registered
I've been here 18 months and on arrival I soon joined a local running team (you can find one near you here www.runnin.com.ar). Now I have lots of local friends which is how I learnt Spanish - in at the deep end. However, there are many other activities whereby you can meet local people (acting classes, palates, yoga, cooking, wine tasting).

I have also met local people through spanglish and conversation exchange (although the latter is more like a dating process but fun nonetheless).

As for age, I think you need to let go. No one cares about it. I'm 50 and have been out with friends until 7am. Plus my friends range from 25 to 55 and they also like to visit pubs but they don't mind if I go home at midnight to get some beauty sleep!

Also, in my Company the primary language is English but I have a sign on my desk that says "no entiendo ingles" and I force everyone to speak in castellano. But the best way to learn the language is to find a Spanish speaking girlfriend (or boyfriend).

So join an activity and you too might end up staying here (like me) with a beautiful Argentine girlfriend (like me) and learn to love this place - despite all its pros & cons!
 

tangocherie

Registered
While you are in the Mecca of Tango, you should definitely give that a try. The tango world is small and we see the same people over and over again--even around the world in different milongas.

Not only does it give your social life a lift, you are learning a skill that you will enjoy all your life.

There are more than 200 milongas/week in Greater BsAs, so once you learn the basic technique, hopefully in a few private lessons, you can find the milongas where you feel most at home with age, style of dance, and location, and start to make friends.

Don't be confused that the tango you see on the street and in tango shows is what the real people of BsAs dance socially. The true social tango is all about the embrace, improvisation, connection, the music, and sensuality--not elaborate steps and memorized patterns.

Try it; you won't be sorry! And if you don't want to leave the house late at night, there are "afternoon" milongas (until 10 or so) every day of the week.

Un abrazo tanguero,
Cherie
 

angelskywalker

Registered
I'm not sure about Spanglish.... it can be very loud and there's only time to introduce yourself and then BANg!! Next one pls aaannnnnd let's start again. But, one man's meat... Plus, met a girl who thought LORD BYRON was a new writer..... :/
 
Top