Dealing with kids asking for money repeatedly after being helped

[Dim Witty]

"Once you give THEY ask again and again..." is an ridiculous generalization. Who is "they"? In this particular case- which seldom happens - just say "no" and eventually they'll stop trying. If you've been threatened, notify the police. Been here 26 years and never felt endangered by the hungry and/or homeless.

 

[Lanick]

"Once you give THEY ask again and again..." is a ridiculous generalization. Who is "they"? In this particular case- which seldom happens - just say "no" and eventually they'll stop trying. If you've been threatened, notify the police. Been here 26 years and never felt endangered by the hungry and/or homeless.

Been here for 51 years and I will do what you say next time.

 

[Stantucker]

"Once you give THEY ask again and again..." is an ridiculous generalization. Who is "they"? In this particular case- which seldom happens - just say "no" and eventually they'll stop trying. If you've been threatened, notify the police. Been here 26 years and never felt endangered by the hungry and/or homeless.

Not always that easy. I have a friend (not an expat) who was harassed and followed more than once by someone he'd given money to. The police are not always nearby, and even if they were, that wouldn't necessarily be much of a deterrent, because they know the police won't do much, if anything.

We have given money to the same guy for years who's outside our apt building, and he'll never give us any problems, but that's not always the case.

 

[on the brink]

I contribute to the Parroquia, the local church, so I tell bell-ringers to go there for help. They seem to understand that.

 

[Redpossum]

I contribute to the Parroquia, the local church, so I tell bell-ringers to go there for help. They seem to understand that.

There ya go, that's a good way to deal with it.

I was inclined to be generous back when my income was adequate to get me through the month, but since Milei has &^*%$'ed the economy, I'm struggling just to keep my head above water, and it's definitely changed my response. If they ask me for money, I reply, "Te parezco hombre que tiene plata extra?" or "Do I look to you like a man who has extra money?". Mostly, however, they don't ask me, as my appearance has become rather damn shabby these days.

 

[jorisw]

I’m sorry but it doesn’t work like that. Once you give they (as in the author’s post) they ask again and again and if you refuse they may get annoyed!

Simplistic and one-dimensional statements in response to thoughtful ones are increasingly pervasive on this forum.

Dim Witty said four things:
- Give if you can
- A smile or encouragement goes a long way
- Tip waiters/waitresses if you can
- Donate clothes

And your cynical two-liner is all you got?

 

[Silvie]

Don’t give money or clothes to people who ask. Only food, if you feel like it. Just donate to charities or Caritas or the churches that you are sure they know how to administer the donations. I donate to a church that also accepts packed food for donations too. Every day young people ring my bell asking for clothes several times a day and I don’t even give them clothes anymore because they will sell them and will throw whatever they don’t like at the entrance or in the middle of the street

 

[jorisw]

> Don’t give money or clothes to people who ask.

I've heard/seen this stance before and I respect it. Just for the sake of discussion, I'm interested in the downsides you see to doing this. I myself can't help but to give what change I got from the supermarket to the person sitting on a mattress on the corner of my block.

It may be true that I can't know how they'll spend it, but (a) that's where I give the benefit of the doubt and (b) I'm not entirely sure that's my business.

An argument I've heard (from Seinfeld no less) is that giving money to the homeless somehow helps to perpetuate their situation, or as he put it, "I'm agreeing to you not being able to get out of the situation". I could see that in the US or the EU, but I'm not sure that translates 1:1 to Argentina. Same for the argument of 'men of working age'. I mean, I'm not comfortable assuming there's jobs for them right now.

 

[Silvie]

> Don’t give money or clothes to people who ask.

I've heard/seen this stance before and I respect it. Just for the sake of discussion, I'm interested in the downsides you see to doing this. I myself can't help but to give what change I got from the supermarket to the person sitting on a mattress on the corner of my block.

It may be true that I can't know how they'll spend it, but (a) that's where I give the benefit of the doubt and (b) I'm not entirely sure that's my business.

An argument I've heard (from Seinfeld no less) is that giving money to the homeless somehow helps to perpetuate their situation, or as he put it, "I'm agreeing to you not being able to get out of the situation". I could see that in the US or the EU, but I'm not sure that translates 1:1 to Argentina. Same for the argument of 'men of working age'. I mean, I'm not comfortable assuming there's jobs for them right now.

Among other things, I’ve see the same people sleeping on a mattress, dealing drugs during day time in my neighborhood

 

[jorisw]

Okay... and that was sufficient evidence to tell everyone not to give anything either, to anyone? Guess I was hoping for somewhat more profound insights.