On The Subject Of Traffic

khairyexpat

Registered
Joined
Apr 28, 2013
Messages
1,064
Likes
531
The wealth of info in this BAexpats forum are REAL and much more useful than what you would read in a Lonely Planet or alike. There are many many reasons to love THE WAY OF LIVING in BA . I will just list only one tiny example, even though it might sound shockingly outrageous. TRAFFIC !!!!

Initial impression of driving here: it is dangerous, aggressive, idiotic and even offensive. But now after 5 years of driving I yet have to report a single (non trivial) fender bender. None. Yes they cross you ... cut you off .. . The worst that could happen is an exchange of "La co**** de la madre" and on your way you go. Traffic lights are synchronized GREEN here. I used to get flabbergasted every time I tried to beat the damn thing not to slam the breaks on every single one of them .... they spend money to synchronize them RED (I would have had a better chance if they were left alone ... random). There are not a stop sign at every single intersection, you don't have to slam the breaks to a screeching complete full stop at every intersection if in your judgment you can see it OK.

In 5 years I had no more than $300 pesos in official tickets, and no more that $200 pesos in unofficial (in the policemen`s hands, mostly because I am still driving with a Canadian Driver License as a 9 year perma-tourist). Grand TOTAL no more than $500 pesos. In Toronto in the 1980's a policeman once handed me 3 tickets in ONE SHOT for US$470 (don't know how much these would be worth now ... a thousands?) because I dared to argue with him speeding to 20km/hr in a 15km/hr zone (a short cut through High Park to work). Of course he had to detain me for 1/2 an hour to lecture me on how people get killed speeding. Here, he is not out to get you to fill his couta.

Calles here are so narrow, yet a bus driver can maneuver it as if it were a bicycle. Toronto streets and highway are wide enough for a jumbo jet to take off, yet how often did they always seem like a parking lot. Wait time for buses and subway range from 3 to 5 minutes, It is not even unusual to see 3 or 4 buses of the same line in a row, whizzing by simultaneously. Of coarse majority of people do not depend on public transit there .... but there are a lot of people including little ol' ladies who would be in the bitter cold, snow and sleet for 20 minutes or more ... a lot.

Subway here is unbelievable ... how many lines .. 7 or 8? how many stations each line? Good ol' Toronto subway is 2 lines (called the ROCKET), and most of the stations are above ground once you leave the downtown core. Your house will be go up more than a US$100,000 if on the subway (that is how scarce it is). They added 2 new stations in a span of 40 years. Here .. 3 or 4 new stations are added every single year.

Trains to the suburbs ... how many lines 12 or so? really don't know .. In Toronto 1 Go Train from Ajax to Hamilton.

Accidents apparently may seem excessive here, but per passenger (there are 13 million people moving here everyday) it might not be too far off from any NA city standards.

Of course there are a lot things that are difficult here, but for me, all in all, it is more than worth it ......
 
The paradox of the Argentine driver:

- I'm glad I can park anywhere, even where it's forbidden, when I need to pick up quickly something... But I hate those dumb drivers who slow me in the traffic because they parked where they are not supposed too!
- It's so cool to driver at 150 km/h on the highway, at 80 km/h on Libertador... But I hate those reckless drivers who don't respect the speed limits, they are dangerous!
- He he, pedestrians crossing the street, watch out, here I come and I'm already late... But who are those crazy drivers who don't even slow down when I'm walking across the street, do they know a car is a weapon?!

etc.
 
Here’s the theoretical driving exam I passed a few years ago, with the answers:

- When do you need to honk?
A- When a lady walks by.
B- When your soccer team just scored a goal.
C- To warn others of an immediate danger.
Answer: A & B

- You are driving much slower than the limit, the traffic light turns orange, what do you do?
A- You stop.
B- You suddenly accelerate before the light turns red.
Answer: B (for the pleasure of the driver behind you who is mad at you since 5 minutes because you’re driving so slow).

- You just made something terrible while driving, another driver is mad at you, what do you do?
A- You apologize and admit your mistake, then you apologize again.
B- You look at the other driver and join together your thumb and forefinger, then you make a repeated movement up and down while pronouncing phonetically KE-TE-PA-SA.
Anwser: B (optional: you can stare at the other driver like if he had just stared the butt of your mother). (optional number 2: if the other driver doesn’t like your original sense of humor, you tell him with your strong foreign accent “porque no te vas a tu pais?”… That should definitely answer the question about who has the most original sense of humor).
 
The thing that terrifies me most about driving in Argentina is the flotilla of motitos in northwestern cities like La Rioja and Catamarca, where a family of five (including two babes in arms), with no helmets, may balance precariously in front of me. At any moment, I expect they're going to tip over and I will inadvertently crush them beneath of wheels of my own vehicle. I will spend a decade behind bars for vehicular manslaughter, but my guilty conscience will last longer than that even though it was probably not my fault.
 
BA drivers look like lunatics, but I actually think they are very good drivers because they are always alert and react quickly. At home you have signage warning you for 3km that the lanes will merge, and every bloody week there is a major crash at the merging point because 'some maniac came out of nowhere'. The provincias is a different story though.
 
Here’s the theoretical driving exam I passed a few years ago, with the answers:

- When do you need to honk?
A- When a lady walks by.
B- When your soccer team just scored a goal.
C- To warn others of an immediate danger.
Answer: A & B

- You are driving much slower than the limit, the traffic light turns orange, what do you do?
A- You stop.
B- You suddenly accelerate before the light turns red.
Answer: B (for the pleasure of the driver behind you who is mad at you since 5 minutes because you’re driving so slow).

- You just made something terrible while driving, another driver is mad at you, what do you do?
A- You apologize and admit your mistake, then you apologize again.
B- You look at the other driver and join together your thumb and forefinger, then you make a repeated movement up and down while pronouncing phonetically KE-TE-PA-SA.
Anwser: B (optional: you can stare at the other driver like if he had just stared the butt of your mother). (optional number 2: if the other driver doesn’t like your original sense of humor, you tell him with your strong foreign accent “porque no te vas a tu pais?”… That should definitely answer the question about who has the most original sense of humor).

This is much more funnier, than an argument/lecture with/from a policeman hiding in the bush 7:00 o'clock in the morning about people being killed left and right at 20 km/hr or at 15 km/hr.
 
Whoo...this is amazing, I have just started driving in Buenos Aires after lot of sleepless nights and my consistent nightmare is 4 public bus crush my car from all the four sides( is it even possible??) ....But I just pushed myself to start driving...

Well definitely I am from India and Indian traffic is a black hole and we have a saying

"if you can drive in Mumbai you can drive in any fucking place in the world"

After 1 month of driving no complains guys, except lot of portenos have shouted me "que boludo" for driving at 110km/hr in highways...
 
BA drivers look like lunatics, but I actually think they are very good drivers because they are always alert and react quickly. At home you have signage warning you for 3km that the lanes will merge, and every bloody week there is a major crash at the merging point because 'some maniac came out of nowhere'. The provincias is a different story though.

Exactly what I'm talking about.

It took 5 years to finally undo the NA way of driving (zero tolerance to use your judgement).

Forgot to mention: Parking Fees. There are nothing to write home about here. I never found myself hard pressed to use private parking, not even in MicroCentro. At the meters it is $1.60 pesos/hr. Otherwise mostly free.
 
The only thing that still scares me are those old pick-up trucks from the fincas that are overloaded with produce and enter the freeway with only 10 kph - while everybody else is driving 100 kph and more. When one of those enters the highway right in front of you - then your life starts flashing before your eyes. Also with no mandatory car inspection here in Mendoza - there are some really scary vehicles on the road.
 
Back
Top