Women Who've Made A Home Here For Love

[IABhutto]

I can tell that you are a classy dude. I hope that your son/daughter never finds out how you refer to his/her mother.

OMG Women advocate jump up to defend women. For women they could do no wrong and every fault is men's...

 

[PhilipDT]

I can tell that you are a classy dude. I hope that your son/daughter never finds out how you refer to his/her mother.

I think we can forgive a little bitterness based on the situation.

OMG Women advocate jump up to defend women. For women they could do no wrong and every fault is men's...

There is nothing in Murvee's post to suggest he or she feels that way, I think he or she was just referring to the choice language that fried turkey used.

 

[IABhutto]

There is nothing in Murvee's post to suggest he or she feels that way, I think he or she was just referring to the choice language that fried turkey used.

Fair enough, my point is: The one who is being victimize will come and complain, not vice versa.

 

[Splitty]

Murvee,
You have no idea what I have had to endure from someone who is hell bent on making my life miserable.
I have tried many times to be rational and logical with her, but in the end gave up.

 

[bkoustav]

Practical advice.
I decided against bringing by wife and 2.5 yr son for a short trip to BA as it is 5+4(halt)+17=26 hrs flight from Kolkata to BA. I will rather visit them in between my 6 months assignment here.

WHOA WHOA WHOA. Stop right there, was reading through this thread and saw THIS and NO, Believe me, you want to be on that plane before he is mobile! Below 6 months is FANTASTIC, they sleep the whole damn way. And you can still get the bassinet. Then 1 yr is harder, but still "ok" -- especially if they aren't an early walker -- you don't have to chase them down the aisles. Now mine just turned 2 on Monday and at the end of the month I'm flying solita with him to San Francisco. I'm already dreading it -- we go to the supermarket here and one of us has to man the cart while the other RUNS, literally runs after this kid. In a park he saunters, but take him to an enclosed area like a shopping mall or super and it's like the kid has just snorted some speed -- he is a maniac. I'm thinking to post on the Mummy's group to see if anyone has a leash they can lend me. We have an 8 hr layover in Dallas on the flight home -- my husband's like, oh yeah just take him on the shuttle to the shopping -- hmm, yeah, that sounds like a whole lot of fun, me, my toddler, and all our carryon crapola on a bus and then in a shopping mall. Though maybe it's the lesser of two evils since the alternative is all day at DFW.

Then since on this July/Aug trip we only cross 1 week with my mum, I'm also taking him home in October, thanks to my mum's 140k airmiles + $600 in taxes. Obviously I booked this trip before ever boarding the plane in July because I have to be insane to do it -- it's 28hrs each way (thanks, airmiles). Buenos Aires - Panama - Mex City - Vancouver -- with 4hrs in Panama and 7 hrs in Mexico from 10pm - 5am. On the way back it's LAX for 12hrs 5pm-5am, then Mex - Panama - Buenos Aires. A nice big FU for your loyalty from Air Canada . These were the best flights available for a reasonable amount of points between Sept and Feb next year. ANd note, 140k was "reasonable" -- the better flights they wanted 300k.

And after age 2 you have to pay full price for your son, so you need to get in as many trips home as you can before that because it breaks the bank after.

Get thee to an airport woman! Suerte!!!

 

[nikad]

This thread is doing a great job of ensuring I uphold the up most care during the act. Love does hold no boundaries however it can create a lot of headaches when it goes off the rails, especially when you introduce a child to the equation and the necessity to bow down to the whims of the now evil ex-wife/partner. I have seen it way too much unfortunately.

Whilst I think the was FT referred to the child´s mother is nasty, I have to give him kudos for staying and being a father to his child. Not many men would do this.

 

[Dublin2BuenosAires]

Whilst I think the was FT referred to the child´s mother is nasty, I have to give him kudos for staying and being a father to his child. Not many men would do this.

This, the language might be a little unsavoury but in fairness, he is sticking around somewhere he does not like for the sake of the kid. Admirable.

 

[shoush]

I met my husband almost 4 years ago! totally fell in love and we got married last year. I have been living in argentina 9 months of the year and 3 month in canada's summer. now i stay in canada a month and a half and he visits for 2 weeks in between. Ive started to really appreciate Canada, the fresh air, living in a house with a garden, and the being able to leave my cell phone and purse on the table at a restaurant without having to worry. I would love to raise kids in Canada and visit Buenos aires every year, but its impossible because my husband has 2 daughters from his previous marriage, and has them 50%of the time, which i totally love and respect!!! deciding to begin a family together was a huge decision, because once we have a baby, I am going to have to live in Argentina, even if we split, because i would never take the baby away from his father.
Ive already accepted and embraced that I will be living in BA for at least another 15 years, because love is so worth it! sorry for the cheesiness!

 

[IABhutto]

Reading, witnessing, and experiencing, conclusion: Argentinian men are much better then Argentinian women.

 

[la_guachita]

Yhanks everyone for the replies! I'm also wondering about how career and income fits into all of this.

@la_gauchita - you raise really important considerations. He's willing to try living in the US, for a few years. He recognizes that it's fair and I need it. But like with Lauren23, I've known since the beginning of our relationship that his heart is here, he wants to raise his kids here, and be with his strong family network. One way of "solving" the custody issue might be making sure my kids get born in the US, right?

Some of the English-speaking expats I know that are stuck here b/c of the kids often end up teaching English for 20 years, what a drag.

What the court considers in both countries is the 'habitual residence' of the child, so not only do you want to have the kid in the U.S., you want that to be established as your habitual residence. Unfortunate, because it is less expensive to have your kid here and less likely that they will do unnecessary procedures to run up your bill or drug test you and take your kid away because you tested positive for a poppy seed muffin (regarding a case making headlines lately: http://www.bbc.co.uk...canada-23153685).