Expats not happy, why stay?

[HotYogaTeacher]

It actually isn't so that we didn't do research before moving here. The truth is it is very hard to find accurate information on a place until you have lived there and know where to look. As for San Bernardo, we went for the experience, and because our friend offered, and because we needed to get out of the city, and because we didn't know that it would be the way it was. If I had done research on San Bernardo I would not have, because I have not since, found a single person who said it was dirty, ugly and boring. When I have traveled in other countries I have never gone where only rich people go, but I have always had a good time and enjoyed myself. Most American families I know can't afford to take their whole families on vacation outside the country. I traveled with my son when he was small and we did go internationally, but we had to save for months and stayed in hostels and didn't buy expensive souvenirs and ate on the cheap. Even so, I've never stayed anywhere, in any country, that was as consistently dirty and broken down as the places I've been in Argentina, even the places that are supposed to be nice.

What a lot of people don't understand is that saying that out loud isn't whining. It is simply telling my experience. I am not unhappy here. I just don't want to stay forever. I still have things to accomplish here and am happy working to get them complete. I love myself, my partner, and my life, wherever I am. I have friends and things I enjoy doing, it's just that none of them are central to being here.

Perhaps the people who are so harsh in their judgments of what they see as a negative post feel that way because they feel judged by my not liking what they love. I hope not. I don't like sun dried tomatoes either. If you asked me to describe them and why I don't like them and then said I was whining I would be offended. As such, I am somewhat offended by all the judgment of my dislike of Argentina and Buenos Aires. I am not asking any of you for advice on how to run my life. I am happy for you all that you have found a place you like. When you say people should do research, perhaps there will be fewer "whiners" if people are allowed to honestly what they like, what they don't and why.

My partner and I will not stay here forever. While we are here we are learning much from many people and many situations and because we value the experience above our comforts we are open to a great deal in terms of what is here for us. Eventually we will return to the states and set up a home in a place that suits us to live for a long time. Meanwhile, know that we don't think you are foolish or wrong if you love it here, why do you think we are if we don't?

Peace...

 

[steveinbsas]

.... I am somewhat offended by all the judgment of my dislike of Argentina and Buenos Aires.

You posted it, so deal with it.

 

[Stanexpat]

It's interesting that you would take such a tone with someone you don't really know. The truth is there are many reasons we are here, but you will not know them. Of course, you don't really care either, to talk to someone deeply about the meaningful story of how their life unfolded. You only want to judge them for not being in your state of mind.

I am glad to have made you laugh though. A smile is always worth having spoken, a laugh twice so.

Peace Brother Expat...

Your perceptions of Argentina are correct for you. Some of the less than kind responses come from people who have an interest in promoting Argentina for a variety of reasons. These same people often post encouragement to people considering a move there. But apparently when someone who actually made the move mentions negative experiences then they draw the kind of insulting responses you received. The title of the post is if you are not happy, why stay? I believe you are leaving and where attempting to explain why. I think this is useful to other users who may be considering a move there.

My own prediction is that most of the posters on this site today won't be far behind you in exiting the country.

 

[HotYogaTeacher]

You see what I mean Steve? Why do you feel it is necessary to write things like that? I don't know you, but I don't judge you either. I am actually a very intelligent, balanced, interesting and polite person, who you would probably like if you took the time to get to know me, rather than attacking everything I say.

It does leave me curious about why you are so intent on everyone either agreeing with you or being wrong/stupid/whiners/ill-mannered, etc. That is a very high horse to ride, careful to hang on tight my friend...

Peace Brother...

 

[steveinbsas]

Your perceptions of Argentina are correct for you. Some of the less than kind responses come from people who have an interest in promoting Argentina for a variety of reasons. These same people often post encouragement to people considering a move there. But apparently when someone who actually made the move mentions negative experiences then they draw the kind of insulting responses you received. The title of the post is if you are not happy, why stay? I believe you are leaving and where attempting to explain why. I think this is useful to other users who may be considering a move there.

My own prediction is that most of the posters on this site today won't be far behind you in exiting the country.

Reality isn't relative, though some feel it is.

I am not promoting Argentina...just sharing my experience and happiness in being here. Others may not be able to duplicate it, especially my married men friends.

This was true in Mexico as well. Most of my men friends loved living there, but their wives were bored out of their minds.

I don't encourage anyone to move here...and never have.

My posts may be considered judge "mental" or harsh by some, but that's their problem, not mine.

Once again, I love it here...and I am here to stay.

 

[steveinbsas]

You see what I mean Steve? Why do you feel it is necessary to write things like that? I don't know you, but I don't judge you either. I am actually a very intelligent, balanced, interesting and polite person, who you would probably like if you took the time to get to know me, rather than attacking everything I say.

It does leave me curious about why you are so intent on everyone either agreeing with you or being wrong/stupid/whiners/ill-mannered, etc. That is a very high horse to ride, careful to hang on tight my friend...

Peace Brother...

Nice try, sister. You have a great approach, but "peaceful" intimidation it isn't going to work with me. You complained about life here and insulted the Argentine culture with your comments. I never called anyone here stupid or ill-mannered. There's nothing wrong with being wrong if you have the ability to recognize and correct it. I didn't call you a whiner, either, but I did ask if you were whining.

You don't have to agree with me about anything. Neither does your new friend, Stan.

The bottom line is that I am happy in Argentina and I accept the fact that I am a foreigner here...from a different culture. You obviously aren't. Your previous posts made it clear the the Argentine people do not meet YOUR standards. That is not a formula for happiness when you are a stranger in a strange land.

Please note that none of my posts criticize Argentines (except for a few ancient ones about my violent Argentine exgirlfriend)...otherwise, only disgruntled expats.

Peace (and love), indeed.

 

[soulskier]

As the one who started this thread, I am glad to see it getting some play.

 

[mini]

Sounds familiar. By any chance did you ever live in the Czech Republic? The expat forum there is awful. This is like a sunny paradise by comparison.

No. But I could be convinced to move there!!

The forum was acutally a very good one. But the comments, complaints & concerns were generally the same. I'm quite fascinated by this fact. Maybe I should do a ph.d thesis on it....

 

[perry]

There are many shades of colour when moving to a new country and the expat experience is difficult for most. I believe that many come here to escape and glamourise Buenos Aires or Paris or Prague or other similar cities. As commited expats we must educate others in an informed manner . This does not mean that we attack or degrade others for having a different point of view.

The truth is that Argentine people for all their inefficiency, surly service and arrogance are also passionate, fun loving and intelligent. Reading other forums about expats living in Prague, London and Paris the community is much more open in Buenos Aires than most. I know many who moved to Prague and all have told me that Prague is one of the most closed societies fullstop.

I also second the point about cleanliness of Porteño apartments and Porteños .In general apartments are clean and porteños smell nice in even the most unglamourous of moments in Subtes and Buses with 35 degrees of heat outside. Sure there are slobs everywhere but there is a pride in appearance here that is noticeable.

In regards to beach towns and communities there are run down places in the most developed of countries. For many this can be charming and after the super glamour of Carilo and its 10000 dollars a month houses I can understand this.

I also would like to understand why people who leave the country and live elsewhere spend so much time attacking Argentina and seem to me to be happy with every snippet of bad news that is reported about this country. Stan Expat this is directed towards you as I feel that your negative experiences have created resentment to all of us who happen to like Buenos Aires and Argentina.

 

[soulskier]

Wow Pericles, calling Stanley out.

In his defense, he did move away but I have never understood why the need to continue with the ARG bashing. If I picked up a left, I would be moving forward, not dwelling on the past.