is this normal behaviour?
- Thread starter austgirl
- Start date
diego7david
Registered
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2007
- Messages
- 187
- Likes
- 15
are they any different in buenos aires? no
Ok I have met far too many women AND men who do this same thing. You meet the guy on holiday, think that it's all great and end up paying for him to come to your own country. Put your thinking caps on people! If you wouldn't pay for one of your own countrymen to do the same thing, why the hell would you pay for a foreigner???
My own family is going through all this bull#$%^ right now with my own bloody sister. She went to South Africa in 2007 for a 3 month rotation at a hospital there. She met a guy, they started going out, she basically paid for everything for them while she was there (he played the I'm South African, my money is worthless card). She went back to Canada, then visited him again for 2 weeks. Then she paid for him to come to Canada for six months. Then the stupid girl, even though the relationship was going badly, decided to get married (or he convinced her, not sure).
Long and the short of it is, my mother paid 25k dollars for a wedding at a hotel in South Africa. My sister paid 6k between wedding ring and dress. Plus tickets back to South Africa. The wedding was on the 6 Dec last year. 1 week later my sister had to fly back to Toronto for work. The family of the guy claimed they had bought him a ticket back to Canada and had the money to do his immigration papers.
3 months later, my sister is back in Canada, the guy is in South Africa. The family is claiming they have no money and that my sister willhave to pay for all his immigration and flight. The guy is on the phone everyday claiming that his life is so hard there and she needs to come up with some cash to get him to Canada.
My boyfriend and I went to the wedding -- the family had a brand new 0km Toyota camioneta and told us they had just bought a 40" LCD TV. In Argentina that would say you do have some cash.
Meanwhile the family keeps calling saying they need money for this, that, and the other. Is it all a scam? Who the f%^& knows, all I know is it's taken well over 30k dollars for my sister to finally have light go on in her head and realise that she's better off spending her money on a divorce lawyer than on his immigration.
All of this would have been avoided if my sister had asked herself one little question: "Hmm... if this guy was Canadian and we were back in Canada would I be willing to pay out thousands of dollars in airplane tickets, food, accomodation, gas etc for him?" The answer is no, she would have thought the guy was a loser right off the bat.
So to all the silly men and women out there, take just a moment to do some self-examination. Would you pay money like that for a guy that was from your home country? Forget the bull$#%@ of Argentina / South Africa / Wherever being a poor country. You wouldn't pay it for a guy from your country so why the hell would you pay it for someone you BARELY know from another country.
My mother has lost a crapload of money trying to keep my sister happy. And my sister, well we'll see how easy it is to divorce. The guy has a way with words and everytime I talk to my sister she says she's going to divorce him, and then the next time I hear from her she's going to pay the immigration. She's standing to lose a lot of time and money on the guy. Next year her salary jumps from medical resident to obstetrician -- a difference of a couple of HUNDRED thousand dollars. If she stays with this guy and they divorce, she could stand to lose even more money -- and thanks to Canadian immigration laws, even if they divorce, she'll still be on the hook for supporting him for 3 years after he's moved there.
To the original poster -- think of it this way, you got off easy. My sister's experience has managed to f%*& over most of my family.
My own family is going through all this bull#$%^ right now with my own bloody sister. She went to South Africa in 2007 for a 3 month rotation at a hospital there. She met a guy, they started going out, she basically paid for everything for them while she was there (he played the I'm South African, my money is worthless card). She went back to Canada, then visited him again for 2 weeks. Then she paid for him to come to Canada for six months. Then the stupid girl, even though the relationship was going badly, decided to get married (or he convinced her, not sure).
Long and the short of it is, my mother paid 25k dollars for a wedding at a hotel in South Africa. My sister paid 6k between wedding ring and dress. Plus tickets back to South Africa. The wedding was on the 6 Dec last year. 1 week later my sister had to fly back to Toronto for work. The family of the guy claimed they had bought him a ticket back to Canada and had the money to do his immigration papers.
3 months later, my sister is back in Canada, the guy is in South Africa. The family is claiming they have no money and that my sister willhave to pay for all his immigration and flight. The guy is on the phone everyday claiming that his life is so hard there and she needs to come up with some cash to get him to Canada.
My boyfriend and I went to the wedding -- the family had a brand new 0km Toyota camioneta and told us they had just bought a 40" LCD TV. In Argentina that would say you do have some cash.
Meanwhile the family keeps calling saying they need money for this, that, and the other. Is it all a scam? Who the f%^& knows, all I know is it's taken well over 30k dollars for my sister to finally have light go on in her head and realise that she's better off spending her money on a divorce lawyer than on his immigration.
All of this would have been avoided if my sister had asked herself one little question: "Hmm... if this guy was Canadian and we were back in Canada would I be willing to pay out thousands of dollars in airplane tickets, food, accomodation, gas etc for him?" The answer is no, she would have thought the guy was a loser right off the bat.
So to all the silly men and women out there, take just a moment to do some self-examination. Would you pay money like that for a guy that was from your home country? Forget the bull$#%@ of Argentina / South Africa / Wherever being a poor country. You wouldn't pay it for a guy from your country so why the hell would you pay it for someone you BARELY know from another country.
My mother has lost a crapload of money trying to keep my sister happy. And my sister, well we'll see how easy it is to divorce. The guy has a way with words and everytime I talk to my sister she says she's going to divorce him, and then the next time I hear from her she's going to pay the immigration. She's standing to lose a lot of time and money on the guy. Next year her salary jumps from medical resident to obstetrician -- a difference of a couple of HUNDRED thousand dollars. If she stays with this guy and they divorce, she could stand to lose even more money -- and thanks to Canadian immigration laws, even if they divorce, she'll still be on the hook for supporting him for 3 years after he's moved there.
To the original poster -- think of it this way, you got off easy. My sister's experience has managed to f%*& over most of my family.
perry
Registered
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2006
- Messages
- 4,647
- Likes
- 2,499
This is an interesting topic and one that I have an opinion about from studying the Porteños since moving here in 2005. I am also australian ausgirl so I can see your perspective here. I do believe 100 percent that the porteños are more egoistical than any australians you are likely to meet . There is an arrogance here and there are many many jokes about this.
Regarding freeloading I have to also say it is much more common to see this behaviour in Buenos Aires than Australia or Europe . These people are sin verguenza and give decent argentinians a very bad name.
Saying all that Ausgirl there are also fantastic Argentine men out there as well and I do know many happy cross culture relationships. The best aspect of the life here is the close family units . Argentine men make great fathers and spend much more time with their children . Sundays are sacred here and will show you the best of Buenos Aires.
Regarding freeloading I have to also say it is much more common to see this behaviour in Buenos Aires than Australia or Europe . These people are sin verguenza and give decent argentinians a very bad name.
Saying all that Ausgirl there are also fantastic Argentine men out there as well and I do know many happy cross culture relationships. The best aspect of the life here is the close family units . Argentine men make great fathers and spend much more time with their children . Sundays are sacred here and will show you the best of Buenos Aires.
Normally what u'll need to do is to meet another guy or may be team of guys who'll take the first one out piecefuly or with pain/damage/casualties involve.
In some cases it does not cost too much.
For example:
drug that annoying moron out of ur place along with his clothes (on), cigarettes and shoes: $400 at night and $1200 in a daytime (for severe humiliation of the moron upfront of public and additional cost of precautions for good Samaritans);
bit a shit out of him moderately, till he pisses his pans (his urine sample guaranteed), no broken bones, no large open wounds: $600/night and $1400/day;
slam the moron trough your door without clothes, cigarretes and shoes or throw the jackass out of ur window, with broken nose, de-fractured lips, bottom jaw, occasional wounds in his rear bottom, a couple of broken ribs and neck dislocation: $1100/night and $2100/day.
And finally letting you to kick his sorry ass: priceless!!
For more drastic measurement: personal contact only.
I wish I could send you our promotional flayer with discount rebates but I think we've got all of them out for this month.
My team has orders in process for the next 2 month in advance.
In some cases it does not cost too much.
For example:
drug that annoying moron out of ur place along with his clothes (on), cigarettes and shoes: $400 at night and $1200 in a daytime (for severe humiliation of the moron upfront of public and additional cost of precautions for good Samaritans);
bit a shit out of him moderately, till he pisses his pans (his urine sample guaranteed), no broken bones, no large open wounds: $600/night and $1400/day;
slam the moron trough your door without clothes, cigarretes and shoes or throw the jackass out of ur window, with broken nose, de-fractured lips, bottom jaw, occasional wounds in his rear bottom, a couple of broken ribs and neck dislocation: $1100/night and $2100/day.
And finally letting you to kick his sorry ass: priceless!!
For more drastic measurement: personal contact only.
I wish I could send you our promotional flayer with discount rebates but I think we've got all of them out for this month.
My team has orders in process for the next 2 month in advance.
Hi Iam a local, yes there are some people like that guy and the right thing to do is to get rid of them as soon as possible, have an honest talk and say what you don`t like, this is not a matter of culture is a matter of honesty and very sorry for you but for sure it won`t happen twice. Fortunately there also good people to meet and more sane
thuy.ashtango
Registered
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2008
- Messages
- 88
- Likes
- 24
austgirl, i hear your frustration. so many people and things come into our lives. sometimes it's hard to track them all, and harder to live a life full of suspicion. sometimes we need to take chances on love, jobs, whatever. so this argie, he wasn't the greatest. that's cool. maybe he's given a lot to past girlfriends and is now jaded. who knows. who cares? the point is, you had this experience, you learned something from it. whatever that may be: some guys are cheap. some guys chastise you on chats. i know that i'm a little wiser for your story. thanks for sharing.
